Chinese brides remain in high demand from foreign men throughout the world.
Despite there being severe competition from other women from, say, The Philippines, Thailand, Russia or a number of Eastern European countries, web sites relating to Chinese brides, both for so-called “mail-order” brides and also for marriage to Chinese women via more conventional routes, always seem to gather the greatest number of searches and hits.
There has been a proliferation of such web sites over recent years offering Chinese mail-order brides but, in reality, this is just one of the options for foreign men looking to find a Chinese woman to be their wife.
So, what is it about Chinese brides that men find so attractive, from both a mental and physical perspective? Well, let’s take a look and see, and also consider what we mean by a “mail-order” bride as compared to traditional dating and marriage arrangements.
For starters, let’s consider:
Why foreign men prefer Chinese brides
Amongst the many options available to foreign men seeking an Asian bride, Chinese brides invariably come out either as the top or one of the first few choices.
- Physical aspects
Maybe this is due to their good looks, fine features and, typically, long black hair; yet also men consider their:
- Femininity and charm: a Chinese bride will, invariably, have an innate sense of charm and femininity—Chinese women seem to have mastered the art of portraying themselves as coy, sexy, charismatic and feminine all at once. Add these attributes to their overall physical appearance mentioned above and ask yourself: which foreign man will be able to resist having a life partner like this?
- Overall presentation: many Chinese women, girlfriends and, of course, brides seem to have an in-built sense of style, that ability to look good in a wide variety of outfits. If we can call this the outer “packaging” for want of a better phrase, you can be sure that a Chinese bride will always want to look her best—for herself and for her man
- Emotional aspects
Then there are intangibles such as the emotional aspects
- Loyalty: a Chinese bride will be fiercely loyal to her husband and her family, defending and supporting them in their careers or, in the case of children, through their education. Don’t be put off if you hear the term “Dragon mother” as it applies to Chinese brides, it’s more than often reverse flattery and it’s often just the Chinese woman’s way of showing that she really cares
- Determination and work ethos: you can be sure that a Chinese bride will be very determined and have a high work ethos—most are not afraid of hard work and will do all that it is necessary to overachieve, both for themselves and their families. More recently, this has been evidenced by the increasing numbers of Chinese women carving out successful career for themselves
Reasons Chinese brides choose foreign men
Chinese brides choose to marry foreign men for a multitude of reasons.
Given the huge numbers of such marriages between Chinese women and foreign husbands, it’s hard not to over generalise. Still, here are a few, key pointers:
- Economic needs: certainly for the so-called “mail-order Chinese brides”, some of the poorer Chinese women are looking for a way out of their economic and other hardships—and a foreign man can offer this: a new life in another country, new found status and financial security. Clearly, this does not necessarily apply to those better educated Chinese women who may have more contact with foreign men in their home country, or who have studied overseas
- Male dominated Chinese society: Chinese brides are living in an essentially patriarchal society where the male is in the dominance, both in general social matters, plus in inheritance or lineage matters. The career oriented, ‘’go-getter’’ type of Chinese lady who might feel somewhat repressed in her home society can flourish with a foreign man who, probably, actually encourages her career and her lifestyle
- More liberal western societies and outlooks: for the more liberated Chinese bride she will soon realise that many western societies, and most foreign men, are far more comfortable with gender equality and with educational and professional opportunities being available for women
- Stability and trust: for the Chinese bride in a male dominated society which allows men to “get away with” many things considered unacceptable in western culture, marriage with a foreign man may be a good alternative. Some Chinese women feel that a foreign man offers more stability, and is less likely to have a string of girlfriends and may, in fact, treat her better than his Asian counterparts
Mail-order Chinese brides or conventional dating?
So now we’ve looked at the attractions of Chinese girls to foreign men, and vice versa, let’s look at some of the reasons for, and difference in, mail-order brides and conventional dating or marriage.
- Conventional ways Chinese brides meet foreign men
Chinese brides can, typically, meet her foreign husband in several ways:
- Working in her home country: the man in question may be working for an international company in a city such as Shanghai or Beijing, or he may be on a business trip working with Chinese contractors or suppliers when our Chinese bride-to-be meets him
- Meeting during study time: alternatively, our Chinese bride may meet her future foreign husband when he is in one of China’s major cities to study at, say, a University—perhaps even studying the Chinese language and/or culture. On the other, hand maybe the future Chinese bride has been to study for a couple of years in the UK or Australia and met her life partner whilst at University there
- Working overseas: a final possibility in this “conventional” dating and marriage scenario is for the potential Chinese bride to have been working overseas for either a Chinese company with a branch in, say the US, or Europe, or with an international company after she finished her studies…, and then at such time met her future foreign husband
- Other ways Chinese brides meet foreign husbands
But what about those potential Chinese brides who aren’t so lucky and, maybe, haven’t ever been outside of their home country—or possibly even qualify as “leftover” women, having reached the grand old age of 27 and been unable to find a local man owing to local prejudices and customs? Take a look at a blog about Asian girls here.
This is where internet dating comes into play:
- Dating websites: either the potential Chinese bride enlists with dating websites who can find her a foreign man to marry—maybe even a foreign man who is already in China or travels frequently in and out of the country, and plans to stay there with his career; someone who just hasn’t the time to do regular dating and yet wishes to have a Chinese wife
- Mail-order brides: then we have the Chinese bride whose chances of finding a foreign man are not as great as those women mentioned above. Maybe they are living in remote areas or their personal circumstances are such that they are looking for a way out of their economic situation—or maybe they just aspire to live in an overseas country with their new foreign husband. For both these type of Chinese brides and their potential foreign husbands where it is almost impossible to meet and date in a “normal way”, the mail-order bride business seems to be a reasonable alternative way forward
At the end of the day for Chinese brides looking for a foreign husband, and for the foreign husband for his potential Chinese bride, it all comes down to a question of demand and supply. I demand, you supply…
If both parties achieve what they are looking for and happiness ensures… does it really matter how you find your Chinese bride or she finds you?